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Hi, I have recently had more surgery for a recurrence of melanoma. It has been just over a year since my initial diagnosis and surgical treatment. I had my lymph nodes removed in my groin. My recent surgery was in early December. I found a lump in my groin which lit up on a pet scan and was removed. I don't know much about the results yet as I wanted to enjoy my Christmas so didn't ask many questions. I do know that, like many other cancers, melanoma is a big deal... I am due to see my surgeon next Friday and after that I have a follow up appointment with my dermatologist who will discuss my situation with me and tell me what is in store for me in times ahead. I did enjoy my Christmas, surrounding myself with family and home comforts, though I did have a lot of pain unfortunately due to arthritis. I realised a few days ago that I had made no effort to meet any friends over the holidays or do any socialising at all. (no-one made an effort to meet me either to be honest - cancer seems to keep some people at a distance, it seems). Anyway, I went out to meet some people from work lastnight. ( I haven't been able to work for over a year now with rheumatoid arthritis, melanoma also making an appearance along the way of course.) I found myself becoming very anxious all day about meeting them and this really surprised me. I went, thinking it would be good for me, but found that I came home early and was feeling very anxious, almost upset about the experience. I'm sure it was a mixture of emotions that came up for me. One, was that it brought home to me a huge part of my life that I have lost (I loved my job a lot and the people in it as much) and two., I felt like an outsider in their company. I'm sure they didn't notice but I found I had little to talk about that didn't involve doctors or pain, which has been a huge part of my life this past year. I tried not to refer to any of it but I did so automatically on one or two occasions. When I came home I was uneasy having spoken about my health. People, I feel don't want or need to hear my woes, especially when socialising. And I am also aware that cancer is something that a lot of people are not comfortable being around. I have suddenly realised since my recent surgery that my life has changed dramatically. I have been working so hard at staying positive and keeping that smile on my face and now I suddenly feel completely detached from the real world. I am beginning to not want to meet anybody who is not family or close friends. is this a stage i'm going through or should I be concerned? I'm hoping it is just part of living with cancer and that I will become sociable again in time. I hate the thought of having to endure counselling and face more emotional stuff but I really don't want to withdraw too much as I'm guessing that's a slippery slope ... Anne

Hi all, Happy new year to everyone and hope you're all doing well! I finally met the Radiation oncologist today and he said it was basically up to me whether I have radiation or not. I told him I'd think about it and get back to him. I've finished my AC treatment but still have 12 taxol to do. I was also given the option of whether I wanted to have taxol or not. The reason being that all my nodes were negative. I decided to go ahead with the taxol as I'd rather be over-treated than under-treated and I was also told that the most recent recommendation from the US was to have it if you're young and that it should reduce the chances of re-occurrence by 1-2%. However, I'm not sure if I also want to have radiation if I'm not being told that I really NEED it. The RO said that one of the tumours was very close to the skeletal muscle and wouldn't have had the 5mm margin on one side but that he couldn't say radiation would be of any benefit to me or increase my survival rate etc. The only possible benefit is a small unquantifiable reduction in the chance of re-occurrence.....so what would you do? On one side I can't wait for treatment to be finished but on the other I want to do everything possible to reduce the chance of this coming back! Thanks Pamela

This coming May will be the 5 year anniversary of my mothers death from cancer. Her and my dad were married 30 years and were best friends.My dad is still as down now nearly 5 years on as he was the day she died.I have 3 siblings and we are all there for him but we are all married with kids so cannot be at home with him full time.He lives on his own in the middle of the countryside and we worry about him on his own.He puts on a brave face for us all of the time but he is always on edge,talking about bad stories he hears around and generally down alot,there is never a positive outlook from him anymore.He retired from his workplace 4 months ago and this has definitely added to his depression as Id say he feels more lost now than ever before.Everything seems to be a struggle for him.I know there is no solution to this really,we cant bring back our mother but I just wanted to put this out there to see if anyone has a similar situation.We hate feeling so helpless for him

Hi Everyone In 2010 I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I was 36, and had a mastectomy, chemo, herceptin, radiation and tamoxofen. I had reconstruction on the mastectomy side and I am now waiting to have my real boob reduced to match my reconstructed boob. I am having this done in the Mater hospital in Dublin. I am on the waiting list now 9 months and would love to know how long were other people waiting to have this done as I will have to wait another 6 months after having this done to have my nipple reconstruction done and I would love at this stage to get my reconstruction sorted and completed. Would love to hear from others

3 months after the end of RT, I am finding my armpit tight(ish) and sore when I stretch it in the last couple of weeks. I had my check up with surgeon on Monday, and he said it's normal reaction after RT, and was generally happy that all was OK. I asked should I exercise it, he said no need it will pass, I said should I NOT exercise it to avoid aggravation, he said no do as normal. I also asked whether massaging would help, and he was ho hum noncommittal. Generally, as far as he's concerned, all's well, so what am I bothered for... Anyway, just wondering whether others here have experience this, and what they might have done to help matters? I must say it is not debilitating, just tight and tender when I stretch, which I feel in the gym, and am concerned I might aggravate. TIA! Catherine

My name is Eamonn and I'm making a new documentary for BBC Northern Ireland which aims to try and understand more about the psychological, physical and emotional impact that cancer can have on the someone suffering from the illness and their loved ones. We need people to share their stories as part of the film. Please let me know if this is something that you could help us with. Many Thanks Eamonn

Hi all, due to start new chemo drugs next week, taxol and herceptin, having weekly treatment, anyone had this, can you give any advice on what to expect. Thanks

Is it enough to attend for the yearly mammo and to go for the follow up appointment a month or two later.. in other words would I need to continue to see my onc. I was on Herceptin and also only stage 1.

Hi all, I had my reconstruction done last year and I am due to go in to get new nipple put on end of Feb. Was told ages ago that's it's all quite a simple procedure, in and out on same day. Anyone get this done? Is it sore, do they just give you a local? Can't remember much that my surgeon told me as was ages ago. Thanks in advance.

Hi everyone, I had my second chemo on Tuesday, and it really hit me hard. I was so nauseous all Tues night, didn't sleep a wink all night. I rang oncology and they faxed on more anti sickness meds on we'd morning. Much better but still I feel crap. I feel like I've been hit by a train. I'm hoping the next one in two weeks isn't worse again, like the whole thing is building up with each treatment. I have 2 more AC to go and then onto to taxol. I've heard that it is not so bad as AC, Is that true? Sorry for the rant, and thanks for listening! Mel