Newly diagnosed
posted by Pisces25
22 May 2022

Breast Cancer Diagnosis

Last reply: 5 months ago

I’m 40 years old and on Tuesday I was diagnosed with breast cancer, invasive ductal carcinoma. Everything since then has just been a bit of a daze, moving through the days but without really being present.
I had an MRI on Thursday gone and have a CT scan Friday coming and a bone scan the following week. The waiting it so hard, I want it dealt with immediately.
I am a mother of 3 children, 20, 16 and 15 and my youngest has her JC in 2 weeks so I’ve made a choice not to tell any of them until that’s over to give her the best chance. I don’t know if that’s the right thing to do.
I’m absolutely petrified. I know I need to be strong and positive but right now I’m anything but. My mind is wandering to the worst places, I can’t sleep, I’m lost and in limbo and I’m really angry. I just want to wake up from this bad dream

6 comments

Comments

commented by libra1975
22 May 2022

6 months ago

Hello Pisces25,
I am really sorry you find yourself in this situation. I was diagnosed in January and had a lumpectomy in February. I am now halfway through chemotherapy. I'll be getting radiotherapy after. I know its hard to stay positive or to distract yourself. My head was filled with cancer the moment I woke up. But I can also tell you, it gets easier once you know your treatment plan. There's great advances in medicine today, and the nurses and doctors really look after you. I think its okay to wait to tell your children. You will have more information by then, which will be helpful. Have you told anyone else? You can always contact a daffodil centre to have a talk . In the meantime try to take a deep breath and try to distract yourself as good as you can. I am sending you strength and a virtual hug, and don't forget, you are not alone. There are plenty of online communities, which are really helpful. I wish you all the best, and remember: this too shall pass.
Bianca

commented by Pisces25
23 May 2022

6 months ago

Thank you for your message Bianca.
I just feel so lost.
I have my husband to support me and I’ve told close friends and family who all know I’m not telling my children yet. I have so much support and yet I feel so alone with this.
I know everyone is different but I just wish I knew a timeline as I think I’d be able to cope better with a plan. It’s hard being in limbo

commented by libra1975
23 May 2022

6 months ago

I understand. I felt the same at the beginning. I remember waiting for my mammogram appointment when it got cancelled. I just burst into tears. I started writing things down, when I was sad, scared or angry. It helped. As soon as you have your plan it'll be easier. You can try mac millan online community, they are great. Even for venting. Give it try, they know how it feels.
I hope you get your treatment plan soon. And don't forget you are not alone.

commented by pamy
30 May 2022

5 months ago

Heya I had the same breast cancer, I was so terrified with the thought of chemo. I did 4 & a half months of chemo. I lost my hair but had no other side effects. I found the nausea tables make u very tired but as I wasn't getting sick, I stopped taking them then. Exercise is the key. It's very important to be active & it's great for the mind. 3 wks radiotherapy which flew. I find talking about it really helps.

commented by Debbie Harrington
30 May 2022

5 months ago

The hardest part as other's have said is the waiting. Once you have your treatment plan you will feel that you have some control over your life again. You WILL get though this. I have just finished my treatment and very quickly I am getting back to normal again. You do find a strength from somewhere. My children are 17, 16 and 11. I didn't tell them until I knew exactly what was ahead of me. For me, that was the right decision. I needed to get all the information, digest it and come to terms with it so that I was strong enough to deal with their reactions. Try to get exercise every day if you can - I walked the legs off our dog - just 40 minutes on my own every day walking helped keep me calm and made me stronger. I wish to all the very best - yes, it's a difficult time in your life, but you will get through it. Take Care.

commented by Orla MB
02 June 2022

5 months ago

Hi Pisces,
Just wanted to wanted to say hi and say there’s always hope and light. I know exactly where you are, and a little bit older at 49. I am truly rudderless without a map or plan so totally understand how you’re feeling.

Had my diagnosis of the same cancer, left breast, in Dec, mastectomy and lymph node removal in Feb.
I was prepared for treatment as much as I could be, they always say prepare for everything. However the surgery successfully removed my cancer.1 tumour and 1 lymph were cancerous but the rest of the lymph’s taken were clear. and I’m now on tamoxifen. Believe me I certainly wasn’t prepared for that either.

Not knowing and waiting is the worst. All you can do is keep busy, active and try to replace the bad thoughts with good. Very best of luck, and hope you get your plan soon. So much they can do today and the breast service is excellent.

Sending positive thoughts💕

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