Ovarian cancer
posted by daisies1507
12 June 2013

ovarian cancer

Last reply: 24 October 2016 12:40

Hi, anyone out there who has been diagnosed with recurrent/metastasis ovarian cancer. Have finished the chemo part (taxol & carboplatin with avastin) and I am on Avastin only.
However, down in the dumps this week and concerned about mortality. While there are lots of women like me - I can't find anyone in the same boat.
Just wondering if it is normal to have these down times as I have been upbeat until now.
Have not told family members about this feeling, as I think they would watch me like a hawk.
Mo

4 comments

Comments

commented by Irish Cancer Society
24 June 2013

24 June 2013 10:33

Dear Daisy 1057,

I am sorry that you have not heard from anyone from the message board yet, I hope that you will hear from someone soon. In the meantime you could call us here on the National Cancer Helpline on Frefone 1800 200 700 (Mon-Thursday 9-7, Fridays 9-5). Here you could talk confidentially with a specialist cancer nurse.

It is not unusual that you will have times where you may feel down or sad and worry about the future, I am sorry it feels so hard for you at present.

Often it helps to talk and share how you are feeling with someone else than keeping it totally to yourself. With this in mind we could give you advice in relation to where your nearest cancer support is located to you if you call us. Many cancer support centres offer counselling services where you can speak confidentially one-to-one and receive support.

Kind regards,
Cancer information nurse

commented by annieo
25 June 2013

25 June 2013 00:58

Hi Mo,

I hope you are feeling a bit better since your post? I am not an ovarian cancer patient but a melanoma patient. I can relate to feeling like there's no-one out there in the same boat. There doesn't seem to be many melanoma people around. (I'm sure that's a good thing in itself!)

I have been very upbeat also. I really was thinking 'I can do this. It will all be fine'. But all of a sudden I crashed over the last few days and I think I'm feeling either deep upset or fear. Whatever emotion it is, it's brewing very close to the surface. The mood change was triggered by a conversation with my employer (I have been out of work as a teacher for months with rheumatoid arthritis. I have had a trying year this year with my health and mobility.) I took from our phonecall that she had little empathy for my situation and certain things she said made me feel that she had no interest in supporting my returning to work. I was shocked and hurt to be honest and I began to realise that I may, realistically, never be back to work. But I am not ready to face that loss yet. I'm still hanging on to that big part of me that I love so much, i.e. teaching.

I had my melanoma in my left thigh. It had spread to the lymph nodes. I have had 2 surgeries since Christmas. But tomorrow I'm seeing my surgeon because I found a hard lump in my left armpit. I have tried not to think about it but I have a bad feeling about it. To add to my medical investigations this week, I'm having a gynae surgical procedure done this Friday. Again, I'm not thinking about it but, like you, I am not telling people this time. I do not want to be a burden. My Dad is very sick at the moment so my family have enough to worry about. I can hardly think about him because I'm trying so hard to keep myself together.

I'm sorry for talking about myself so much. It's just that I had forgotten how hard this cancer business can be at times. You think you are doing so well emotionally... and then, boom, the feelings can hit you again in one split second, for whatever reason.

I think that if my new lump turns out to be a recurrence I will just have to tell my family, hard and all as it will be for them. Life is just extra hard for people sometimes. I have tried so hard to protect them over the last few weeks by keeping my medical worries from them but all that time I've been secretly hoping someone would read my mind and reach out to help me.

I have probably gone way off the topic Mo but your post got me thinking and wanting to offload. You are not alone Image removed. I think though in time we'll be back smiling and upbeat again just as quickly as we went down. You hopefully are up already! It's hard not to think about the fears from time to time. We will probably just have to get used to it.

Best wishes, Annieo

commented by daisies1507
27 June 2013

27 June 2013 15:00

Hi. Glad to read your message. It is "normal" to feel sad at times. The past few weeks I thought my bladder had moved up behind my eyes, as every time I thought about my cancer & treatment - and the prognosis, I cried. But had a session in ARC House and the Counsellor gave me the opportunity to talk through how I felt. In reality I knew I had to talk to the Oncologist and ask the questions, but the session allowed me to say this outloud. Ready for this now.
Sorry to hear that work is not supportive at this time. Life is tough enough without a worry like that. Focus on yourself for a while - get out and give yourself a treat and be kind to yourself. Hope visit to surgeon about lump goes well and that you don't have frightening news.

commented by myra101
24 October 2016

24 October 2016 12:40

Hello daisies1507. My name is myra clancy I haven't got ovarian cancer I am a survivor of somebody that did have it. Its very important to tell your family friends about it even if you don't feel like talking about it they can try and comfort you

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